Video: Tila Tequila Attacked at Concert, Wounded by Beer Bottles, Feces

Tila Tequila says she was attacked on stage at a concert in Illinois this week.

The unstable former reality star got up in front of a crowd of about two thousand at the Gathering of the Juggalos in Illinois, an event featuring acts such as the Insane Clown Posse and Kottonmouth Kings.

From there, this is what she told TMZ went down:

"I went onstage and immediately, before I even got on stage, DUDES were throwing HUGE STONE ROCKS in my face, beer bottles that slit my eye open, almost burnt my hair on fire cuz they threw fire crackers on stage, and they even took the sh*t out of the port-0-potty and threw sh*t and piss at me when I was onstage."

Continued Tila:

"These people were trying to kill me. So then after the last blow to my head with the firecracker they threw at me exploded, my bodygaurd and the other security grabbed me and ran as fast as they could to the shitty trailor. Since their security SUCKS, the 2 thousand people ran after us, trying to kill me. They almost got me so they finally reach the trailor, blood all over myself, cant stop bleeding, then all of a sudden, all 2 thousand people surround the trailor and busts the windows!!!

Even the guys INSIDE with me were shaking! Their hands were shaking cuz they were so scared! So 3 guys inside the trailor had to grab a table and push it over the broken windows and grabbed all the chairs they could find so hold the people from outside back. It was scary as hell!"

Tequila, of course, faked a suicide in June and is in serious need of mental help.

That doesn't mean this incident didn't occur (police confirm they responded to the scene, with the sheriff saying things "got out of hand") - but that details from Tila's mouth can't ever always be trusted.

** UPDATE: There's now video of the incident! Check it out below, as Tila continues to rap and curse off the crowd, even as it boos the heck out of her and starts to throw stuff...

Tila Attacked!

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Philip Markoff, Accused Craigslist Killer, Commits Suicide in Jail

In a shocking conclusion to an already tragic story, the man known as the Craigslist Killer committed suicide in a Boston jail, according to authorities.

Philip Markoff, a former medical student who was accused of killing a masseuse he met through Craigslist, was found unresponsive in his cell Sunday.

He was pronounced dead at about 10:15 a.m.

The death is still being investigated, but Markoff was alone in his jail cell. Evidence indicates he took his own life, according to a statement by both Boston Police Commissioner Edward Davis and Suffolk County D.A. Daniel F. Conley.

Philip Markoff was found suffocated with a plastic bag over his head.

In June, Markoff pleaded not guilty to charges that in April he lured masseuse Julissa Brisman to a Boston hotel, then bound, beat and fatally shot her.

His attorney, John Salsberg, said Sunday, "I'm shocked and saddened by the news" of Markoff's death. The accused criminal was only 24 years old.

Back in April, Markoff was placed on suicide watch after officials expressed concern that this exact scenario would happen. Sadly, it appears it did.

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Patti Stanger, Andy Friedman Call Off Wedding

The Millionaire Matchmaker still hasn't made the right one for herself.

Patti Stanger has called off her own wedding to Andy Friedman, she revealed on Twitter Sunday: "I just ended my relationship with Andy," she wrote.

They had been happy together for a long time, however, "It hit me really hard that I want kids in my life. You have to agree on the non-negotiables."

That seems to imply her man did not want children. The 49-year-old Bravo star, who got engaged to Andy Friedman last year and was with him six years, apparently never mentioned the kids thing between 2004 and right now?

It was not to be for Patti Stanger and Andy Friedman.

After announcing the sad news, Stanger Twittered, "Thank you so much for all the supportive messages, Tweets, emails and Facebook comments. It means a lot."

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Kourtney and Khloe Bid Farewell to Miami, Not Reality TV

The season finale of Kourtney and Khloe Take Miami aired last night, but don't worry fans: these two utter wastes of Oxygen will be back next Sunday night for the premiere of Keeping Up with the Kardashians!

For now, let's review the final 2010 installment of Kourtney and Khloe scripted series, as brought to you below by a THG intern...

Season finales are meant to conclude with a bang, but this one was pretty dull. As they prepared to head back to California, Kourtney and Khloe handed off the Dash store and tied up loose ends and... that was about it.

I wonder if Dash will go to sh*t - literally and figuratively - again now that the girls are leaving. I’m sure some crisis will be staged so the girls have to jet back down eventually and film a third season.

The point of the whole episode was to show Kourtney and Scott Disick going through couples counseling. Despite the fact that Kourtney says she hates therapy, she goes to one of Scott’s sessions. She says she wants to support him, but not enable him.

She speaks privately with the doctor later on about the fine line between the supporting and enabling and breaks down a little.

For someone who is extremely open and runs around practically naked, Kourtney doesn’t reveal much of what she truly feels. Scott seems surprised to see her cry. I guess Kourtney is just used to putting on a face for the cameras.

When she and Scott sit down to have a discussion, he constantly interrupts and berates her, sending her further into tears. By the way, it’s not easy to cry through that many fake eyelashes.

After everything is packed and Khloe has hosted her last radio show, the girls are about to leave and Scott comes over to say goodbye. We see Scott shed a few tears and try and gain forgiveness from Kourtney. Much to Khloe’s happiness, Kourtney tells Scott he needs to get himself together first and she leaves for Los Angeles without him.

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Jesse Csincsak and Ann Lueders: Engaged!

Jesse Csincsak and Ann Lueders, his girlfriend, are getting married.

Congrats to the snowboarder and former winner of The Bachelorette, and to Lueders, who later competed in Jason Mesnick's season of The Bachelor!

This whole community is just so weird.

Jesse won the final rose from DeAnna Pappas in 2008 over Mesnick, who went on to star on The Bachelor the following season. DeAnna just got engaged to Stephen Stagliano, the twin brother of Bachelor contestant Michael Stagliano.

In any case, Jesse Csincsak and Ann Lueders are happy now, although to hear him tell it, the proposal itself could have gone a little more smoothly.

"When I first asked for Ann's hand in marriage, her dad didn't realize that Ann wasn't supposed to know," Jesse tells People of his engagement to Ann.

Hopefully Jesse Csincsak's engagement to Ann Lueders lasts longer than his previous attempt! It probably will, since they didn't meet on a reality TV dating show.

"He went inside the house and Ann and her mom were just chatting and he goes, 'So Jesse just asked me a very interesting question. He asked me if he could marry you.' And she goes, 'DAD! You're not supposed to tell me that!'"

"He didn't do it on purpose!" adds Csincsak, who previously dated former Bachelor contestant Holly Durst, now engaged to Michael Stagliano of all people.

"He was just trying to be the typical happy go lucky dad!"

But in no way did it ruin her excitement when the moment came. Jesse popped the question on the shore of an island in Lake Erie near her Ohio hometown.

Despite the spoiler alert, the bride didn't expect it. "I told Jesse, 'I wish I knew this was coming,'" Ann Lueders said. "I would have ran a brush through my hair!' "

The pair will wed before the end of August in Las Vegas.

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Stephanie Pratt Still Estranged From Spencer Pratt

It seems like just yesterday he brought his lil' sister into The Hills fold. Now the show is over and Stephanie Pratt and Spencer Pratt have not spoken in a year.

The Hills came to an end earlier this summer, but the family drama did not. And unlike anything you saw on the MTV show this past year, it's actually legit.

Stephanie Pratt says the disconnect between herself and her loose cannon brother is, ironically, real: "In September it will be a year [since we've spoken]."

"It's getting more normal and more normal."

Stephanie and Spencer Pratt: The Hills has come to an end, but his weirdness and isolation from loved ones continues. [Photos: PacificCoastNewsOnline.com]

Though she says she'll be there for Spencer Pratt whenever the time comes to talk, Stephanie doesn't appear to be itching to dial her bro's number, either.

The 24-year-old says it's "his choice" that the two don't communicate, even as he finds himself in the midst of a divorce from plastic bride Heidi Montag.

Still, she's willing to bury the hatchet when he is.

"When he's ready to come around, I'm going to greet him with open arms," she says. "I love him more than anything in the world. He's my blood."

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Lawyer for Joe Jonas: My Client is Not Doing Demi Lovato!

Joe Jonas turned 20 years old on Saturday.

But the singer isn't in a celebratory mood today, as his lawyer has fired off a letter to Zack Taylor because that celebrity gossip blogger continues to insist that Jonas is slipping it to ex-girlfriend Demi Lovato.

TMZ has published the document, which takes issue with an article on Taylor's website that states Joe and Demi are "friends with benefits." Due to the differences in the stars' ages, this is a dangerous accusation, one attorney Rob Cohen writes is "completely false, offensive and defamatory."

Moreover, the letter (read it here) accuses Taylor of a "malicious attempt to attack and devalue [Joe's] good name and reputation."

Joe and Demi broke up in May. They are currently touring together, which Jonas says is fine because they remain close friends.

The singer's lawyer demands that Taylor remove the posting in question or face a lawsuit. In the meantime, Joe will continue to possibly court Ashley Greene, an actress of legal age who we're guessing he'd gladly be accused of giving it to.

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Jesse James: Dating Kat Von D?!

Is Jesse James already moving on ... with Kat Von D?

The motorcycle mogul, whose divorce from Sandra Bullock was finalized in June, was seen having dinner with fellow tattoo enthusiast and LA Ink star Kat Von D.

She's definitely his type ... well, at least the same type as the women he cheated on Sandra Bullock with. She's like a better looking, less insane Michelle McGee.

Settling into a table at Palms Casino Resort's N9NE in Vegas Saturday, the duo didn't bother spreading out in the booth, but got cozy sitting next to each other.

Wonder how Sandra and his kids feel about this ...

Are Kat Von D and Jesse James an item? We can see it ...

The two shared the restaurant's signature rock shrimp and classic Caesar salad. They also both enjoyed the filet with a side of asparagus, and drank Fiji water.

People magazine not only unearthed those incredible culinary details, but reports that toward the end of the meal, the tattooed duo were seen holding hands!

Sounds like more than a friendly dinner to us, right?

Kat, who even defended James and his mistress this spring, continued holding hands with him as they left and headed to a black Mercedes James was driving.

Watch out, Kat. He's on three ex-wives and at least that many mistresses at last count. That doesn't necessarily mean he'll cheat on you too ... but he so will.

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THG Caption Contest Winner: August 13

Friday's edition of The Hollywood Gossip Caption Contest tasked our readers with writing the best caption for this picture of Jessica Alba getting pulled over.

Our winner is Nikki. Congratulations! The winning entry appears below.

Honorable mentions to out to Abhishek Duggal, CrazyDani and Chris. Thanks to everyone who sent in caption(s) and best of luck again next time!

"This had better be good officer, because everyone reading The Hollywood Gossip is looking at your flat ass... as we speak!"

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Happy Birthday, Madonna!

Madonna Louise Ciccone, better known by just her first name, is one of the most successful recording artists in music history. She needs no introduction from us.

It's hard to believe that the star's debut album came out 1983, setting the stage for her immense popularity and pushing of boundaries across the music spectrum.

She helped popularize MTV and transform pop with hits like "Like a Virgin," "Papa Don't Preach," "Like a Prayer," "Vogue," Hung Up," "4 Minutes" and many others.

Commercially and critically acclaimed, Madonna's diverse musical offerings have won respect and millions of fans over the years, not to mention much controversy.

Madonna turns 52 today. Give it up for the Material Girl!

More recently, her music was immortalized on Fox's Glee, and her relationships with Alex Rodriguez and Jesus Luz have kept her in the celebrity gossip spotlight.

She's also a mother to Lourdes, Rocco, David and Mercy.

Here's hoping she keeps on rocking for years to come. Click to enlarge the gallery of Madonna pictures we've put together below and wish her a happy birthday!

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Vanilla Ice, Bare Boobs, Urine-Soaked Watermelon Featured During Night of Tila Tequila Attack

Key details involving a washed-up rapper, bare breasts and a piece of fruit covered in human excrement are emerging regarding the Saturday night concert at which Tila Tequila was brutally attacked.

For once, the mentally unbalanced D-lister has not invented a sordid story, as multiple reports confirm that Tila did, indeed, suffer bloody wounds as a result of a rowdy crowd at the Gathering of Juggalos in Illinois.

A former professional wrestler named Colt Cabana was in attendance, for example, and says attendees began to boo lustily as soon as Tequila took the stage and started rapping her single, "I Fucked the DJ." In response, the former realty star took off her shirt - but this only elicited more insults and projectiles, such as beer bottles...

... and a watermelon that had been soaked for two days in urine and feces, a security guard allegedly claims, which a concert goer had been saving for Tila.

Despite this incident (or maybe because of it), Cabana said he enjoyed the event, specifically the performance of Vanilla Ice on "Ninja Rap" from the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze soundtrack. Really, he said that.

Meanwhile, Tequila's rep says a "lawsuit is pending" regarding the beating (which you can watch HERE); while her manager adds:

"Tila has gotten medical care for the horrific attack that happened to her this weekend at the Juggalos event in Chicago and is in good hands right now and under medical direction. She would like to thank all of her fans for all the love and support that they have given."

The entire thing is shocking. Seriously, who knew Tila had fans?!?

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Bristol Palin and Levi Johnston Reach Custody Agreement, Vow to End Entertaining PR War

Bristol Palin and Levi Johnston have reached a deal in their custody battle over son Tripp, and will not be bashing each other in public anymore, either.

For them, this is great news. For us ... boo. What fun is that?

Under the deal, filed with an Alaska Superior Court, Bristol Palin will get primary physical custody of lil' Tripp, who turns two years old this winter.

Levi Johnston will have visitation privileges, taking place between 9:00 a.m. and 4:00 p.m. on Saturdays and 12-6 p.m. on Wednesdays as well.

Hopefully this doesn't conflict with his mayoral campaign.

The agreement states that Levi has to pay Bristol child support. No amount is stated, but the calculation is based on earnings of $72,000 a year.

Most intriguingly, both parties now legally agree not to "speak badly about the other parent in front of the child ... or to allow anyone else to speak badly about the other parent or members of their family in front of the child."

In other words, no more Sarah Palin talking $h!t about Levi or vice versa. Again, probably for the best, yet a little disappointing for THG staff.

Moreover, if anyone violates this, they're cut off: "The parties shall not allow the child to visit with, or interact with, any family member who publicly ... or in front of the child, criticizes the other parent or the other parent's family."

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