January 12, 2010

Tila Tequila Twitter Ticker: Possible Pregnancy Ahead!

Breaking, almost definitely made-up news: Tila Tequila is pregnant!

In her latest stream of Tweets - which follow last night's God-based barrage - Tila claims she is taking the high road; that haters are pissing off the Almighty; and hints strongly that she has a bun in her warped oven.

Like Tina Fey impersonating Sarah Palin, the most damning, hilarious evidence of Tequila's publicity-inspired madness is simply to list her Twitter messages word-for-word. Shake your head over them (listed from latest to oldest, all within an hour) below...

  • Thank u everyone for your kind words. I am off to bedrest again now. I have let go of all anger inside of me. It feels so good! TTYL! xoxo
  • My Wife has passed away and all I have left is the baby. I wish mean people can just respect the dead and respect a new life growing inside!
  • The doctor i visited says that all this stress and negative people around me getting me upset, can affect the baby in a bad way. Pls stop.
  • Yes I promised myself and my wifey that we WILL NOT discuss anymore thing about this. SO with that said. I have AMAZING NEWS 2 SHARE W/U!!!

Tila Tweets

  • I just want to go back to the way things were. Let me mourn my wife in private. I want to talk about the FUN things that I wanted 2 tell u!
  • As for me, I am so tired. I have no energy to defend my wife anymore. I faint, Im tired & this is not good for my baby. Leave us alone pleas
  • & for the haters. Please stop. Enough with this vile vindictive behavior. Respect my Wife please. She is dead. Let her rest in peace please!
  • My only wish is 4 all the negative people to leave me alone please. I dnt want to talk to media, I dnt want 2 deal w/haters. Leave me alone.
  • I love my wife and will always forever. I'm not doing a press tour like those other people "AHEM" we know who they are. Gross! Whatever.
  • Those disgusting people who talk shit about my wife are upsetting God right now, and that is who she's with. I'm taking the high road now.

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